Its true! Especially the Carlisle one.

We went there the other day for a refreshing change from Tesco and all that we came away with was anger, hatred and a general desire never to go back to ASDA. Ever.

Where do we begin? Well for starters ASDA is a lot further away and the Car Park is on a slope and a completely random layout. Who builds supermarket car parks on slopes knowing full well what happens to trolleys full of shopping when left unattended?! Cue dented cars. So we finally get in to ASDA, well briefly anyway as we need to get cash but the cash machines are actually out the other side of the lobby. I wouldn’t mind this if it wasn’t for the fact that there’s nothing out the side of the building, no car parking spaces so you actually have to go out your way to get there or go through the entrance and out again. Genius.

Cashed up we set foot inside whilst being eyed up by the security guard keeping watch over the 6ft Mumble stuffed penguin in the lobby after apparent attempts at kidnap. Setting foot in unfamiliar territory we decide to just go from right to left and up and down each aisle. Off we go, but we have to go through a thoroughly useless electronics and homeware section before we get to the food. Yawn.

We then make our way down the food aisles till we reach the other end where we realise we actually haven’t found anything worth eating. We quickly spot what are actually the only saving graces for ASDA, two packets of Kit 4 Kat Chunky’s for £1 and the full selection of Frey Bentos pies. So we go down the other aisles which should be frozen food, which they were. But there was only about 3 of them and 1 was full of chips and frozen veg and the other was full of…nothing really.

The pizza selection was laughable. There must’ve been about 3 brands outside ASDA’s own and they were all over filled. We decided to risk the ASDA own brand (big mistake as they are actually inedible). The same can be said for the meat aisles although Uisdean did find a Peppered Rump Steak on offer, but he was feeling rather horrid the next day so that may have been the cause. My own steak was full of fat and gristle, not something I expected for the price.

All in all we walked away with various amounts of food last Tuesday, which we had pretty much eaten by yesterday and they weren’t even any good. The prices are more than Tesco, you get less anyway and the font on the labels is the worst ever. They have hardly any 2 for 1 offers either. Shocking.

It’s so out the way and utterly useless I doubt anyone would actually miss it if it disappeared overnight.

We went to Tesco today. It was much nicer despite the fact we bought absolute junk food to console ourselves.